Recently, I’ve met a lot of other friends in chairs. Attending Project Walk has given me the opportunity to socialize in a more natural environment, with others in my situation. I remember after I was first hurt, my parents used to desperately try to convince me to talk to peers, and go to the support groups. I heard about the “Disabled” sports and “Handicap” activities, but I’m going to be honest, that wasn’t for me. For starters, I was unable to see myself as disabled. I still cringe when I hear that word and if it were up to me, both of those words would be unattached to my life. I just felt uncomfortable. It took me a very long time to accept what happened to me and it took even longer to recognize the confidence behind my wheels. As I’m sure many of you can imagine, I wasn’t expecting my life to turn upside down at 21. I don’t know if I recovered mentally in a way that anyone should follow, because I was so down for so long, but I do know the steps that I took were life changing, and have helped shape who I am now.
Needless to say, I was ashamed. I was embarrassed, I was scared and I felt like being tied to activities with wheelchair bound people would take me farther away from my old life. I know that sounds harsh, but it was the truth and I own it. It was an ignorant and naive way to think, but there is no rule book of how to cope after a SCI. You just survive; but lately, as i’ve gotten more into a world where I can connect with others in chairs, I am noticing the strength that so many have so quickly, and it’s encouraging.
“How long have you been in a chair?”, tends to be one of the first questions we ask each other. I’m impressed when I see those clients who are only months to a year post injury, but their attitude is undeniably positive. I realize now that it is important to find yourself a community of positive people, whatever that may be for you. Getting to know who you are in a chair is a journey, you just have to be open and willing to realize your life has changed. I have had many people ask me if how they feel is “normal.” Well, world, I don’t really know how to answer to that, Ive never in my life thought I was sane or normal outside of this chair let alone in it, but I think we all cope in different ways and there is no right answer.
If you are struggling with a Spinal Cord Injury or any traumatic injury and you feel that your life has turned upside down, know that you are not alone. We are all different in many ways, but find a community where you can share your feelings and ask the questions.
At the end of the day, we all have two choices when something life altering (in any capacity) happens to us. You can crawl in a hole and make yourself invisible for a short while, while the rest of your world keeps moving OR you can push forward and crush those emotions. Accept them, manipulate them and realize you will be stronger then anyone ever thought you could be when the initial shock is over. It’s your choice!
Needless to say, I was ashamed. I was embarrassed, I was scared and I felt like being tied to activities with wheelchair bound people would take me farther away from my old life. I know that sounds harsh, but it was the truth and I own it. It was an ignorant and naive way to think, but there is no rule book of how to cope after a SCI. You just survive; but lately, as i’ve gotten more into a world where I can connect with others in chairs, I am noticing the strength that so many have so quickly, and it’s encouraging.
“How long have you been in a chair?”, tends to be one of the first questions we ask each other. I’m impressed when I see those clients who are only months to a year post injury, but their attitude is undeniably positive. I realize now that it is important to find yourself a community of positive people, whatever that may be for you. Getting to know who you are in a chair is a journey, you just have to be open and willing to realize your life has changed. I have had many people ask me if how they feel is “normal.” Well, world, I don’t really know how to answer to that, Ive never in my life thought I was sane or normal outside of this chair let alone in it, but I think we all cope in different ways and there is no right answer.
If you are struggling with a Spinal Cord Injury or any traumatic injury and you feel that your life has turned upside down, know that you are not alone. We are all different in many ways, but find a community where you can share your feelings and ask the questions.
At the end of the day, we all have two choices when something life altering (in any capacity) happens to us. You can crawl in a hole and make yourself invisible for a short while, while the rest of your world keeps moving OR you can push forward and crush those emotions. Accept them, manipulate them and realize you will be stronger then anyone ever thought you could be when the initial shock is over. It’s your choice!